It’s been a really empowering week for me, let me tell you why. All my friends and family have been dealing with breakups, breaks, fights, and battles within their love lives and I stand back and watch thinking thank god that isn’t me. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with having or wanting a relationship there isn’t, and if you can find a man who allows you to be your independent bad ass self then keep him. But at 21 currently building my life, a man isn’t part of my plan.
In the future sure I want kids, I want a family, and I want a husband who will support my decisions and my career, someone who’s going to stand back and watch me work. I don’t want your bank account I have my own and I don’t need you to financially support me, just like I don’t plan on financially supporting you. We’re equals.
But right now, I don’t have any desire for confinement and you better believe I never will. I am loyal and I am faithful but don’t ever tell me you won’t allow me to do something. Because I simply won’t allow you to be in my life any longer. You are not my keeper, I do not need your permission and last time I checked the door was right there if you feel differently. Will I respect you? Of course. Will I be there for you? Of course. But I am in no place to put anyone before me. I come first and I’m not making any sacrifices for you. I will not be dependent on you and I never want to feel like I am forced to stick around because without you I can’t afford my cost of living.
You better believe if you’re in my life it’s because you’re wanted there, I will never need you there. Independent women scare men and that’s fine, I don’t need a man who can’t handle me anyway. I’m a handful, I know this. I work, I go to school, I hustle, and you better do the same because if not, there’s the door. You will not be the only man I can get and I will not struggle without you. The only struggle I’m facing is to go to the gym after work or later tonight. This isn’t your playing field, I always have the ball and if you’re going to stand in my way then we weren’t meant to walk any kind of path together.
I get asked all the time, wouldn’t you like to have someone and be with some? Sure, having someone is great. But I refuse to compromise what I think I deserve for the sake of “having someone.” If I have someone it will be someone who has rightfully earned to be there in my life. I don’t need problems this isn’t high school and if you’re not ready to battle alongside me then you’re not meant for me because I’m not following anyone. So many women don’t realize their worth but you hold the power and he simply doesn’t. This is about you and you are the queen… You do not need a king to rule the kingdom.
I’ll take Queen Elizabeth any day because my kingdom doesn’t need a king.
Neither does any of yours. You rule this kingdom, he’s just a bystander. My mom always told me to act like a lady, be polite, dress appropriately and to always say sorry when someone says your wrong. My daddy taught me to never take anyone’s shit, set your goals and fight for them forget anyone who tries to get in your way.
Mom always said if someone hit’s you you tell the teacher, daddy said if someone hits you, you hit them back so hard they forget their first name.
Where mom tried to raise a lady, dad tried to raise a lady who didn’t take anyone’s shit.
And Dad won.